Wholehearted

I step outside with my husband and our 2-½ year old granddaughter. It’s a chilly spring evening and we want to release some wiggles before bedtime.

I’ve watched the spring color begin at the ground and move up. The grass turned first, then the smaller trees sprouted green buds or pink and white blossoms. The 60’ trees are still bare. Next month green will be everywhere. But tonight the earth is still in transition. 

We walk down the stairs to the patio and draw a hopscotch grid with chalk. We take turns hopping. The game transports me to a schoolyard in Oklahoma, where I’m wearing PF flyers and knee socks. Where I play because it’s fun. Not because I should exercise. 

I return to the evening when I see my 6’3” husband hopping on one foot and then the other. I watch all 3’ of my grand girl bounce from square to square.

After hopscotch, we burst into a game of tag. I hold her hand and we run as fast as 2 year-old legs can, while my husband chases us through the yard. 

When my husband tags me, I let out a belly laugh that has been buried for a while. He laughs too. 

Why don’t we play like kids on a playground anymore? Yeah; I know why.

But this evening we started with a purpose, then got lost in the moment. We were present to laughter and movement. Free for a few moments from should have’s or supposed to’s.

Play (and rest) is one of Brene’ Brown’s guideposts to wholehearted living. She explains that play is purposeless, which means that we play because it’s fun and we want to.

But in “today’s culture — where…we base our worthiness on our level of productivity — spending time doing purposeless activities is rare.”

Sometimes “…the idea of spending time doing anything unrelated to the to-do list actually creates stress.”

I’ve been there. You too?

Brene’ quotes Dr. Stuart Brown, founder of the National Institute for Play, who explains “…play shapes our brains, helps us foster empathy, helps us navigate complex social groups, and is at the core of creativity and innovation.”

Greater empathy, creativity, and innovation?

Better health and functioning?

Who knew play is so good for us?

If I’m serious about wholehearted living, I may want to be intentional about play, down-time and rest.

Our little granddaughter, her baby brother and their parents have been with us since a few days before the stay-at-home order.

Their presence — made possible by the worldwide pandemic — has been a daily reminder.

• 

• To dance in the kitchen, sing along and read aloud
• To climb a sideways growing tree and balance on the curb
• To run, hop and laugh out loud
• To notice plastic Easter eggs hanging from a tree and curled up worms on the wet pavement
• To wonder why and squish scone dough
• To build a rocket ship out of a cardboard box
• To try something new and raise our voices outside

But life outside our little world is not so simple.  

My husband works in healthcare and shares daily reminders of suffering, sacrifices and isolation. One woman in our town shared her story — of losing both parents and her only sibling to COVID-19 within 3 days.

I’ve read the ‘same storm’ idea on several people’s social media accounts. People like to say we’re all in the same boat, but we’re not. We’re in the same storm.

One of us is shipwrecked. Another — her basic needs met — is able to pause, reflect, enjoy downtime and family time.

We each have different needs and perceptions. We’ll each emerge from this in a different way. We each have lost something. If we ask questions and listen, we may see or even feel someone else’s pain. 

I wonder what I will keep from this time. Will I remember that life can change in a day? Will I tell stories of loss and heroes, physical distancing and virtual connections?

Will I look back on the days I played for the sheer joy of it? And be grateful I became intentional about play? I hope so.